How to Destroy America

There is an interesting article that seems to be sweeping the internet in email and blogs. The article is a third-person account of a speech from late 2003 by Richard D. Lamm, former Democrat governor of Colorado. The author of the article (apparently one Frosty Wooldridge), judging by the commentary, believes that immigration is destroying America. The speech itself is not so much anti-immigration as anti-multiculturalist, speaking to the attitudes Americans have toward immigrants from other cultures.

I disagree with Frosty. As a country of immigrants, I'm not sure that we should view immigration as the poison that will destroy us. I agree with Governor Lamm that multiculturalism is the poison. The recent French riots bear this out. The rioters were immigrants whose families are poor because they are unassimilated, not because they are immigrants. As Lamm says below, "If we can put the emphasis on the 'pluribus' instead of the 'unum', we can balkanize America is surely as Kosovo."

Below is the speech by Lamm against multiculturalism: if you want the speech with the anti-immigration commentary you can find it at one of the first two links above.


I Have A Plan To Destroy America

Richard D. Lamm

I have a secret plan to destroy America. If you believe, as many do, that America is too smug, too white bread, too self-satisfied, too rich, lets destroy America. It is not that hard to do. History shows that nations are more fragile than their citizens think. No nation in history has survived the ravages of time. Arnold Toynbee observed that all great civilizations rise and they all fall, and that “an autopsy of history would show that all great nations commit suicide.” Here is my plan:


I. We must first make America a bilingual-bicultural country. History shows, in my opinion, that no nation can survive the tension, conflict, and antagonism of two competing languages and cultures. It is a blessing for an individual to be bilingual; it is a curse for a society to be bilingual. One scholar, Seymour Martin Lipset, put it this way:

The histories of bilingual and bicultural societies that do not assimilate are histories of turmoil, tension, and tragedy. Canada, Belgium, Malaysia, Lebanon-all face crises of national existence in which minorities press for autonomy, if not independence. Pakistan and Cyprus have divided. Nigeria suppressed an ethnic rebellion. France faces difficulties with its Basques, Bretons, and Corsicans.

II. I would then invent “multiculturalism” and encourage immigrants to maintain their own culture. I would make it an article of belief that all cultures are equal: that there are no cultural differences that are important. I would declare it an article of faith that the black and hispanic dropout rate is only due to prejudice and discrimination by the majority. Every other explanation is out-of-bounds.


III. We can make the United States a “hispanic quebec” without much effort. The key is to celebrate diversity rather than unity. As Benjamin Schwarz said in the Atlantic Monthly recently:

...the apparent success of our own multiethnic and multicultural experiment might have been achieved not by tolerance but by hegemony. Without the dominance that once dictated ethnocentrically, and what it meant to be an American, we are left with only tolerance and pluralism to hold us together.

I would encourage all immigrants to keep their own language and culture. I would replace the melting pot metaphor with a salad bowl metaphor. It is important to insure that we have various cultural sub-groups living in America reinforcing their differences rather than Americans, emphasizing their similarities.


IV. Having done all this, I would make our fastest growing demographic group the least educated - I would add a second underclass, unassimilated, undereducated, and antagonistic to our population. I would have this second underclass have a 50% drop out rate from school.


V. I would then get the big foundations and big business to give these efforts lots of money. I would invest in ethnic identity, and i would establish the cult of Victimology. I would get all minorities to think their lack of success was all the fault of the majority - I would start a grievance industry blaming all minority failure on the majority population.


VI. I would establish dual citizenship and promote divided loyalties. I would “celebrate diversity.” “Diversity” is a wonderfully seductive word. It stresses differences rather than commonalities. Diverse people worldwide are mostly engaged in hating each other-that is, when they are not killing each other. A diverse,” peaceful, or stable society is against most historical precedent. People undervalue the unity it takes to keep a nation together, and we can take advantage of this myopia. Look at the ancient Greeks. Dorf’s world history tells us:

The Greeks believed that they belonged to the same race; they possessed a common language and literature; and they worshiped the same gods. All Greece took part in the Olympic Games in honor of Zeus and all Greeks venerated the shrine of Apollo at Delphi. A common enemy Persia threatened their liberty. Yet, all of these bonds together were not strong enough to overcome two factors . . . (local patriotism and geographical conditions that nurtured political divisions . . .)

If we can put the emphasis on the “pluribus,” instead of the “unum,” we can balkanize America as surely as Kosovo.


VII. Then I would place all these subjects off limits - make it taboo to talk about. I would find a word similar to “heretic” in the 16th century - that stopped discussion and paralyzed thinking. Words like “racist”, “xenophobe” that halts argument and conversation.

Having made America a bilingual-bicultural country, having established multiculturalism, having the large foundations fund the doctrine of “Victimology”, I would next make it impossible to enforce our immigration laws. I would develop a mantra - “that because immigration has been good for America, it must always be good.” I would make every individual immigrant sympatric and ignore the cumulative impact.


VIII. Lastly, I would censor Victor Hanson Davis’s book Mexifornia — this book is dangerous — it exposes my plan to destroy America. So please, please — if you feel that America deserves to be destroyed — please, please — don’t buy this book! This guy is on to my plan.

”The smart way to keep people passive and obedient is to strictly limit the spectrum of acceptable opinion, but allow very lively debate within that spectrum.” — Noam Chomsky, American linguist and US media and foreign policy critic.

Governor Lamm misidentifies the author of the book Mexifornia, whose correct name is Victor Davis Hanson. More info on the internet phenomenon of the Lamm speech is available at snopes.com.


filed: us.politics; world.politics

The Politics of Science: The Muzzling of Dissent

The Wall Street Journal printed an op-ed today by an MIT scientist who alleges that his climate-related research has been sandbagged when it disagrees with conventional "alarmist" scientific theory on global warming. He presents a well-documented yet accessible overview of the issues in question and levels some pretty strong charges at global warming propenents.

I haven't heard much besides bombast from both sides of this issue so I haven't had a strong opinion on it, but this cleared up a lot of things for me. It's a must read.


OpinionJournal.com: Climate of Fear


filed: science; politics

Necessity is their Mother...

From the Remote Control to GPS to the Internet, Popular Mechanics gives us their top 50 inventions of our time--plus some interesting background on each one.

Popular Mechanics: Top 50 Inventions

filed: technology

Guest Feature: Lubbock in the Dark V: Drug Abuse

Ruth Bradley is a crack reporter and an official Friend of the Brink. (Crack: adj; of superior excellence or ability. She is not on crack, nor does she report exclusively about crack.) She's got a five-part series on social issues in Lubbock, Texas running in the Texas Tech student paper, the Daily Toreador. We'll link to the articles, and we'll also run them here since you have to sign up to view them on the site.

A few days before his high school graduation, Steven Parkson decided to take a road trip. He often traveled to Lubbock from his home in Lake Travis to party with the fraternity he hoped to join one day.

Parkson said he remembers the drive well, remembers "drinking and drugging the whole way." He also remembers the accident.

Parkson crashed head-on into a single-cab pickup, totaling both vehicles and injuring the four passengers in the other vehicle.

"When I got in the back of that cop car, I was crying," said Parkson, a senior history and political science major. "It became real clear to me that there were serious consequences to your actions."

Violent incidents like this are highly correlated to drug abuse said Lisa Karnes, crime analyst for the Lubbock Police Department.

"When people use drugs, they don't think clearly and do other crimes," she said.

Tony Menchaca, a lieutenant in the criminal investigations department of the Lubbock Sheriff's Office, said use of illegal drugs greatly increases crime.

"Drug abuse is a nexus for just about every kind of crime you can imagine," he said.

It especially increases the violence of crimes, he said, and the aggression of the perpetrators. Because of this, drug abuse affects not just the abuser, but also the community as a whole.

"We have a pretty big drug problem here, and there's a great deal of money involved," he said. "And that's causing tons of problems."

Gilbert Arredondo, a sergeant in the Texas Department of Public Safety Narcotics Division, said narcotics officers are having particular problems with methamphetamines, because their users become addicted so quickly.

"You can't be a casual user of methamphetamine," he said. "You don't own it, it'll own you."

Other illegal drugs commonly sold in the Lubbock-area include cocaine and crack. Sometimes these are transported into Lubbock 10 or 15 tons at a time, Menchaca said.

"It's a humongous business, it really is," he said. "These guys are making tons of money."

And it seems to be growing.

"Our arrests and seizures for narcotics have probably tripled the last couple years," Arredondodo said.

The problem has become so large that the Lubbock Police Department Narcotics division no longer is able to do much in-depth work, Menchaca said. Instead, they are struggling to keep up with the calls that come in on a daily basis about problems in various neighborhoods.

"They don't have the time to do long-term investigations," he said.

The causes behind drug abuse are varied and complex. Mary Gerlach, behavioral health director for the Lubbock Regional Mental Health Mental Retardation Center, said some people begin abusing in an attempt to self-medicate mental problems, such as depression. Children who grew up in a home where abuse was accepted are more likely to become addicted as well, Gerlach said. And for many, drug abuse starts as an attempt to belong.

"While it's not an accepting peer group, it's the closest thing they ever have to one," Gerlach said.

For Parkson, who began experimenting with drugs at age 14, this was exactly what drugs offered.

"I always felt a little different," he said, recalling having trouble fitting in during his years in middle school. But the first time he got high, that feeling went away.

"I felt like it filled in my awkwardness," he said. "(It) kind of brought me out of my shell. I felt like it helped me to be me - whatever that was."

So Parkson continued to do drugs, experimenting with pot, mushrooms and other hallucinogens. Just a year after he first tried drugs, he started selling drugs to other students, and doing drugs on a daily basis.

"I loved being high," Parkson said. "I spent all my time trying to be high."

The feeling of being high becomes both a physical and a biological need, said George Comiskey, associate director for the Center for the Study of Addiction and Recovery.

"There's just a physiological energy that happens when they put a drug into their system," he said. "You want that feeling; you want that feeling over and over."

Comiskey said addiction is a combination of disorders, affecting health, emotions and social life.

"There's a part of them that says 'I can't live without this' - it's become their best friend," he said.

Finally, there comes a point where users no longer can control their needs.

"When you want to quit and you can't quit, you are officially addicted," Comiskey said.

Abusers often become even more dependant on drugs as the consequences of addiction begin to affect their lives.

Comiskey said addicts often take drugs not only to get high, but also to forget the emotional and relational problems caused by their actions. This is why so many former addicts go back to drugs, even after years of being clean.

"When life gets overwhelming, that drug is always out there as an option," Comiskey said.

After the wreck, Parkson said he constantly felt this need to feel better.

"I started taking pills, I started taking more drugs," he said. "I was just kind of on this merry-go-round, this cycle of addiction - it's kind of like self-hate."

In the midst of this, Parkson met his first serious girlfriend, and, eventually her father.

Parkson said her father became an important figure in his life, and he was convicted by this man's lifestyle and attitude.

"I felt really guilty around him, you know?" Parkson said. "Because my life wasn't right."

Because of his influence, Parkson said he became a Christian, began to attend church and quit drugs cold turkey. He was able to stay clean for six months, before he experienced a relapse, while drinking on his 21st birthday.

"I thought I could control it," he said.

The reawakening of his alcoholism quickly led to the reawakening of another old habit. Under stress from work and school, Parkson slipped back into drug abuse long enough to realize that he might need additional help.

He attended a local 12-step meeting, and spent time at Dove Tree Ranch and Faith Center, two private Lubbock rehabilitation centers.

But private treatment centers like this are scarce, and expensive in the Lubbock area, Gerlach said. The other alternative, state-funded treatment also is scarce, and the demand so high that applicants must often wait for weeks before they actually begin the program.

"So when they do get ready to get help they have to wait two to six weeks," she said.

By this time, many of them have gone back to their addictions.

"You've got to hit someone when they're ready, or they're not going to do anything," Gerlach said.

Although resources are limited because of funding cuts, Gerlach said MHMR does offer help to those who realize a need. The center provides a 24-hour crisis line at (806) 740-1414.

Gerlach said she'd like to see more rehabilitation centers and similar programs started in Lubbock, particularly for the youth. Currently, there are no treatment centers for juveniles in Lubbock.

"None of the private facilities see a need to open one up," she said.

The nearest youth rehabilitation center is in Plainview.

There is more help available for Texas Tech students, Comiskey said.

The Center for the Study of Addiction and Recovery offers programs specifically designed to help students through education about the problem, and through accountability. The center can be contacted at (806) 742-2891.

More than anything, people trying to recover need support, Comiskey said.

"You really have to help them change their life," he said.

Since his recovery, this has been one of Parkson's goals - to encourage people who are now were he once was.

"I was taught that the Lord has given me a gift," he said. "And the only way to keep that gift is to give it away."

Since his recovery, Parkson has worked to help users, working with Lubbock's Adult Drug Court, which helps first-time felony offenders of drug-related crimes, and with Christ in Action to reach those struggling with drug abuse.

And, most importantly, he tells his story - a story he hopes will bring hope to others.

"It can be overcome," he said. "It doesn't have to be the end, it can be the beginning."


© Copyright 2006 Daily Toreador

Ruth wrote me to comment on her story; I include her comment here:

Dear Huevo,
One thing I was struck with about these stories is that, with the exception of the child abuse issue, in Lubbock at least, the only organizations that are able to help with these problems are church-based.
You and I were talking the other day about how many of these, especially homelessness, need to be handled on a case-by-case basis, because of their complexity. I think the church really is the only feasible way to deal with these, and moreover, it is the only way to really fix the problems.
I wasn't able to include this interveiw in my story, but one of the homeless men I talked to said, and I completely agree with him, that even if you can start programs to meet all these physical needs, it won't end the problems. The real problem is not drugs, or homelessness, or prostitution, those are the symptoms. The real problem is what these people really need is Jesus, because without Him there is no hope, no reason to live, and no reason to change.
The prostitute that I talked to, Anita, said the main reason she was on the street was she was looking for someone who truely cared about her -just for her. That was something she couldn't find at home, or on the streets, and truely, that's only something she's going to find in Christ.
That is the root of the need, and the real cry of these people.

note: Parkson's name has been changed here to protect his identity.

Guest Feature: Lubbock in the Dark IV: Racism

Ruth Bradley is a crack reporter and an official Friend of the Brink. She's got a five-part series on social issues in Lubbock, Texas running in the Texas Tech student paper, the Daily Toreador. We'll link to the articles, and we'll also run them here since you have to sign up to view them on the site.

Eddie Richardson experienced the civil rights movement firsthand, watched as the vestiges of slavery disappeared from Lubbock. But, nearly 40 years later, he said the bigotry the movement fought to abolish remains.

"Racism is alive and well in Lubbock," he said. "And it's a lot more sophisticated racism than you'll find in a lot of places."

As the co-publisher of The Southwest Digest, a newspaper oriented toward the black community of Lubbock, Richardson has studied the history of his race in the town. Though signs of outright discrimination have vanished, Richardson said in some ways things really have not changed.

"Instead of calling your boy a n*gger, they'll call you son," Richardson said. "But the results are the same."

Richardson said he believes that old racist attitudes are forming anew in the upcoming generation, and that, combined with economic setbacks, is a large part of why many blacks in Lubbock have difficulty finding opportunities.

"Until the playing field is leveled," he said, "it will always be that way."

Blacks are not the only ethnic group dealing with racism. City Councilwoman Linda DeLeon, a member of the Hispanic community and another longtime resident of Lubbock, said many Hispanics in Lubbock face similar attitudes, particularly in the job market.

"I think there's still some lack of sensitivity," she said. "I think some people are still chosen by their ethnicity, instead of by their qualifications."

DeLeon, who travels regularly, said she has found many people outside Lubbock have similar views about the town.

"Lubbock has a reputation for racism," she said.

Christopher Blue, president of the African American Student Society, said part of this reputation might be Lubbock's location in a conservative part of the country. But where college students are concerned, he said another reason may be the low number of minorities at the school.

According to Texas Tech's Institutional Research and Information Management Web site at www.irim.ttu.edu, 878 blacks attended Tech in fall 2005, about 3 percent of the university's 28,001 students. Hispanic students formed approximately 10 percent of the student body, with 3,073 attending.

Comparable numbers at the University of Texas at Austin found at www.utexas.edu/academic/oir/ show close to a 4 percent enrollment for blacks and a 14 percent enrollment for Hispanics.

Crystal Ramirez, president of the Hispanic Student Society, said she believes these low enrollment numbers are partially due to a lack of emphasis on the recruitment of minorities at Tech.

Bidal Aguero, a Lubbock native and editor and publisher of El Editor, a Hispanic newspaper, said he believes Tech should be helping to spread diversity in other ways.

"I think that the university's not doing enough to show the different cultures that exist in our community," he said.

Demographics are not only a problem at Tech, Aguero said. North Lubbock is primarily populated by blacks, he said, while a large group of Hispanics has made their home in Northeast Lubbock.

"We can still see a lot of segregation," Aguero said.

The 2000 Census of Population and Housing at http://planning.ci.lubbock.tx.us shows that a majority of Hispanics and blacks do inhabit these areas. Hispanics appear to be more integrated into the community as a whole, the lowest percentage of Hispanics in a given area is 4.6 percent. Blacks, however, seem less integrated, with less than 1 percent of the population living South of 98th Street and a little more than 1 percent living in several midtown areas.

"A lot of it is the availability of the houses people can afford," Aguero said. "I guess you could also put a little blame on (the fact that) people want to be were they're liked and where they're welcomed."

Aguero, who grew up in Lubbock, said certain practices have changed, but he still feels unwelcome in certain places in Lubbock. And though signs prohibiting blacks and Hispanics from businesses are gone, he believes the attitudes behind them have sometimes remained.

Other things have remained, too.

In 1923, the city of Lubbock issued Ordinance No. 225, prohibiting persons with 1/8 or more black blood from living or owning property anywhere south of 16th Street and East of Avenue C, with the exception of hired servants. Violation of the ordinance was punishable by a fine of not more than $200, with each day lived outside the district considered a separate offense. The ordinance states that blacks living outside this area are a threat and that "their residence is dangerous to the health and pollutes the earth and atmosphere."

Jane McDaniel, assistant to the city secretary, said that there is no evidence that the ordinance was ever enacted. But Richardson said there was a time when blacks were forced, if not by law, at least by precedent, to stay on that side of town. Moreover, he said that even if the law was never enforced, the fact that the ordinance is still on the record troubles him.

"Lubbock should have the decency to have a meeting and take it off the record," he said.

He believes that by doing this, the city will be able to take a stance against the attitudes that once were so prevalent.

"It would show the heart of the city," he said.

Richardson's business partner, T.J. Patterson, said the ordinance and others like it in other cities helped plant the seeds of racism during that time period, seeds that brought about racist mindsets in following generations.

"Segregation was a national word," said Joan Y. Ervin, a native of Lubbock.

Ervin recalls the times of forced segregation and said she now chooses to live in the part of town where people of her race were once forced to stay. She believes the situation in Lubbock have improved dramatically.

"There has been a complete change - a shift in knowledge because of intelligence," she said.

Erwin said it is important for people of all races to prepare themselves to be qualified to serve as pathfinders in their community. She said she is proud of her own accomplishments in Lubbock, namely becoming the first black to serve on the University Medical Center's Hospital Board of Managers.

But perhaps her greatest achievement was accomplished while serving on the school board beginning in 1970. The first black and first woman elected to public office in Lubbock, Ervin helped create and enact a plan to integrate Lubbock schools.

There have been improvements in diversity as well.

David Buckberry, a planner with the City of Lubbock, said he has observed a trend toward more varied neighborhoods.

"We're actually very far from complete integration," he said "but we've made a lot of progress there."

And there's the North and East Lubbock Redevelopment project, created by Mayor Marc McDougal, which Patterson believes has great potential to help bring economic prospects to minorities.

"Many young people leave Lubbock because there aren't opportunities," Patterson said.

DeLeon said she agrees minorities are often overlooked when it comes to jobs.

"Until we get people in leadership that do not hire by color, but do hire by qualifications, things will change very slowly," she said.

DeLeon said she believes the best way to fight racism is for the community to work together and for people to get involved politically to incite change.

Patterson said although laws and ordinances are good, they are not the answer.

"You cannot legislate it," he said. "You gotta live through it. And your heart's got to be right."

Patterson said he believes all Americans need to work on their heart attitudes and realize that "we are all God's children."

But the greatest key to eliminating racism, he believes, is instilling respect and understanding in the upcoming generation.

"Tell the children, we all got to get along," he said.


© Copyright 2006 Daily Toreador


filed: social.issues

Guest Feature: Lubbock in the Dark III: Prostitution

WARNING: Mature and disturbing themes follow, detailing some ugly details of prostitution. Kids, talk to your parents before you read this.

Ruth Bradley is a crack reporter and an official Friend of the Brink. She's got a five-part series on social issues in Lubbock, Texas running in the Texas Tech student paper, the Daily Toreador. We'll link to the articles, and we'll also run them here since you have to sign up to view them on the site.

Anita Morales was 14 years old when she first sold her body for sex. The price was $30.

She took cues from her friend Lita, a fellow homeless teen, who had worked the streets since she was 12 years old.

"She told me to take the money up front and just go in there, take off my clothes and lay on the bed," Morales said.

Morales knew she needed the money. But she did not know how she would feel after the stranger had finished.

"It made me want to hide," she said. "It was a mark that had been placed on me - like somebody just threw paint on me. I felt like everybody could see it."

That same day, Morales and Lita spent their earnings on drugs and got high together.

"Right then and there, I felt that I had found the escape for the disgrace I had just endured," Morales said.

It was an escape into a cycle Morales said most women on the street are caught in - one of shame and dependency.

"(I) continued in my prostitution," she said, "so I could continue in my escape, and in doing so, I became an addict."

Eighteen years later Morales sits in a Lubbock County Jail cell. She is small, 5 feet 5 inches, with large eyes and curly hair pulled into pigtails. She has worked the streets off and on ever since that day.

"It's not something that I like to do," she said, "but it seems like its something that's calling me back."

Morales is incarcerated on charges related to her drug abuse for the second time. The first time, she spent her time and money on a correspondence course, earning her associate degree in child psychology. But when she got out of prison, she found the degree was not enough to get her a job. A fast food chain told her she was overqualified. Other companies couldn't see past her criminal background.

"When times get hard, I go back to what I know," Morales said. "For me, that's prostitution."

Sex workers like Morales are more common in Lubbock than people think, said Cpl. Theresa Bulls of the Lubbock Police Department.

"Most people don't see them for what they are or know about it, but it's been a problem," she said.

The exact number of women is difficult to pin down because many prostitutes come through Lubbock only to leave soon after for another city, Bulls said.

Morales recalled a group of at least 15 to 20 women that she used to work with on Lubbock streets. Freddy Harris, outreach worker for the Lubbock Regional Mental Health Mental Retardation Center, said he knows of at least 25 women working in Lubbock now. He said he believes there are many more he does not know of.

"I think in some parts of the community, some citizens see it as a big problem," said Lubbock City Councilwoman Linda DeLeon.

DeLeon said she receives one or two complaints a year about prostitutes in her district. One complaint involved a group of prostitutes who were working a corner near a school bus stop.

Residential sightings do occur from time to time, Bulls said.

"A lot of these neighborhood kids are going to know who they are for what they are," she said. "They become desensitized to the actual problems that are going on. It tells them it's a way of life."

Prostitution is a misdemeanor for the first two convictions and a felony for the third, said Bulls. Several times a year, the Lubbock Police Department conducts stings in which officers go undercover to catch women in the act of prostitution or men in the act of soliciting.

"It's prostitution for (men), just like it's prostitution for the women," Bulls said. "Both people are guilty of it."

And prostitution is not just a crime - it's a crime that attracts other crimes. Bulls said prostitutes tend to be surrounded by theft, drug abuse and crimes of violence - even murder.

In September 2005, pregnant prostitute Summer Baldwin, 29, was beaten to death, stuffed into a suitcase and left at a Lubbock city landfill. In 2004, Linda Trevino Carbajal was found dead in the middle of a road just outside New Deal, killed by a blunt-force head wound. In 2003, in a ditch west of Slaton, the body of Cynthia Palacio was found, partially nude and strangled to death. All were friends of Morales.

After the murders, Morales said she and her friends started a "buddy system," watching out for each other more, making sure they knew who their friends were "dating" (a term the women use for having sex). But violence still occurs.

Morales was raped often, once for two hours straight. She was beaten and left for dead three times. Once, a client tried to stab her in the face. Her hand is scarred where she blocked the knife.

"I'm real paranoid now," she said. "It's a weird life. I don't even know why we indulge ourselves in this madness. 'Cause it is, it's crazy."

The majority of the women Morales knew are battered other ways, too, living this lifestyle to get away from abuse or neglect in their former lives.

"Most of us keep hoping we'll find someone who cares about us, just for us," she said. "But nine times out of 10 it doesn't happen because of who we are - what we've become."

Prostitutes also battle disease. Although most use protection, many men will pay extra if they do not. And even with protection, prostitutes always are at high risk.

"Sex workers have a lot of sex partners," said Vilka Scott, disease intervention specialist for the City of Lubbock Health Department. "When it comes to disease, the more partners you have the more disease you spread."

Morales said several of the women she knew had diseases, but worked anyway. And since the same men often come back looking for different partners, it is difficult to avoid having sex with someone who has a disease.

"We just can't pinpoint who they've dated," Morales said, "so it's like we're playing Russian roulette with our lives."

Harris regularly distributes free condoms to prostitutes on behalf of MHMR, a service that helps greatly, Morales said.

"If it wasn't for them, there'd be a lot of diseases going around," she said.

Although many women charge whatever they can, Morales has set specific prices: $40 for oral, $50 for sex, $60 for both. On a good night, Morales said she would date close to 15 men, and on a regular night, five or six. And then there were the nights when no one came. On these bad nights, she remembers walking aimlessly up and down the streets all night with the other women, because they had nowhere else to go.

Morales said each of the women she knew was special in some way - beautiful, or musically talented or kind.

"But they settle for less because they feel it's OK," she said. "They feel they're not worth more."

Bulls said she believes that many of these women started out as victims.

"But at some point, they have to realize what they are doing," she said.

When they do reach this moment, Morales believes most prostitutes do want to get out, but don't know how to escape.

"It's not like there's a prostitution anonymous," she said. "If there was something that could be offered to us, a majority would take it."

She paused and sighed deeply.

"How do you relieve your weariness?" Morales said.

Morales said she knows 14-year-olds and 50-year-olds who are prostitutes - little girls entering the nightmare that the woman standing on the corner next to them can't stop.

"We want to get out of this lifestyle so bad, but this is all we know," she said. "This is what we've been through, and change is hard, and change is scary."

She laughs.

"People don't just come up to prostitutes on the street and say, 'Hey you want another chance at life?'"

But some are beginning to. In Memphis, Tenn., that is exactly what Carol Wiley is trying to do with the faith-based "A Way Out" program, an outreach of Citizens for Community Values of Memphis.

"The goal is to help any woman to get out of the sex-for-sale industry," Wiley said.

The organization does this by providing counseling, drug rehab, housing and training for jobs and in parental skills. And they meet these women where they are, visiting street corners with their message of hope for those who want it.

Wiley said working with these broken women takes persistence.

"It's hard at times, but it's also a real joy when that light comes on and they get it," she said, "(that) they are worth more than standing out on a street corner."

Wiley said she hopes to help start other programs like theirs. More information about "A Way Out" can be found at www.ccvmemphis.org or by calling (901) 685-1493.

Other cities have programs that can help, though not specifically for prostitutes. Dallas, Houston, Temple and Corpus Christi have programs that can help these women to get off drugs and back to their lives, said Harris.

"In Lubbock, we don't have stuff like that," he said. "We're behind times. We're slow-motion."

Harris said he would like to see the city and churches get involved in helping these women by helping them get rehab, jobs and homes.

"If you're gonna take drugs out of this hand, put something in the other hand," he said.

Morales said she encourages prostitutes to look for that help and to learn to understand their value.

"Our lives are precious," she said. "And we're worth more than what we're settling for."


Copyright 2006 Daily Toreador


For more on the Memphis, Tennessee program A Way Out, see this article.


filed: social.issues

Guest Feature: Lubbock in the Dark II: Child Abuse

Ruth Bradley is a crack reporter and an official Friend of the Brink. She's got a five-part series on social issues in Lubbock, Texas running in the Texas Tech student paper, the Daily Toreador. We'll link to the articles, and we'll also run them here since you have to sign up to view them on the site.


Every day, somewhere in Lubbock County, a child is abused.

Sometimes the abuse is emotional. Sometimes it's sexual or physical. And sometimes the abuse will end the child's life.

"We've had children that die, children that sustain pretty serious injuries," said Shawn Vandygriff, investigation program director for Children's Protective Services. "Children are hurt every day in our community because they don't have someone to protect them."

In Lubbock, reported abuse is high, according to the Texas Kids Count 2005, a compilation of statistics from the year 2004, found at www.cppp.org. Out of counties in Texas in 2004, Lubbock ranked 19th in size. It ranked third in the number of children in foster care. And it ranked fourth in child abuse, with a rate of 12.2 per 1,000 children. The Texas rate was 8.2.

Vandygriff said these high numbers may be the result of awareness and subsequent reporting in the Lubbock community. Although official numbers for 2005 have not yet been released, Vandygriff estimated that nearly 2,500 cases of suspected abuse were reported. Of these, between 25 percent and 30 percent were confirmed by Children's Protective Services.

In Texas, reporting suspected child abuse is mandatory.

Abuse falls into seven categories, said Catherine Bass, executive director of the Children's Advocacy Center of the South Plains. These include physical abuse, emotional abuse, medical neglect, abandonment, neglectful supervision, physical neglect and sexual abuse. Regardless of type, most cases have one thing in common: The perpetrator is usually someone the child loves.

"Eighty to 90 percent of our perpetrators are people that we know, people that we trust," said Dakesa Piña, director of clinical services for the Children's Advocacy Center.

When Bass was growing up, the catch phrase for child abuse was "stranger-danger."

Now, she said, out of almost 650 cases the Child's Advocacy Center dealt with last year, only four involved strangers.

Motivating factors behind abuse are varied, said Vandygriff. Abuse can stem from frustration, stress, lack of good parenting skills, and, especially, substance abuse.

"We've seen a substantial number of children and a singular increase in problems due to drugs and alcohol," said Vandygriff. "Because, of course, when you're impaired, you can't take care of your kids."

And sometimes, people become perpetrators because they themselves were once victims, Vandygriff said.

This is just one of the many long-term effects of child abuse, Piña said.

"The kids deal with things like nightmares, problems sleeping, what we call semantic problems," Piña said. "Kids sometimes will get aggressive behavior, cause they don't know how to communicate what they're going through."

Piña said victims of sexual abuse are especially likely to deal with the effects of their abuse later in life.

"You can be ashamed of your body," Piña said. "You can not be able to have intimate relationships (because) it might trigger the feelings you had when you were sexually abused."

Sexual abuse is prevalent in Lubbock, Vandygriff said, and is usually committed by a close family member, such as a father or a mother's boyfriend.

Bass said a close relationship enables the perpetrator to build trust.

"Normally it's someone who has access to the child that can groom them and make them feel like it's OK," Bass said.

Girls are three times more likely to be sexually abused, but that number may be slanted because boys are less likely to report it, Piña said.

Sexual abuse also is difficult to pinpoint because the symptoms are not as apparent as they are with other types of abuse.

"We rely pretty heavily on … the child making an outcry," Vandygriff said.

Many children simply do not recognize what is going on, Piña said, and do not know enough about sex to protect themselves.

"We don't like to talk to kids about sex and sexual things," she said. "But it's important that we educate them."

One of the goals of the Children's Advocacy Center is to help children pinpoint what is happening and be able to communicate it. Children's Protective Services and the Lubbock Police bring children to the center for interviews, which are videotaped for use by investigators and sometimes as court testimony.

Bass said this recorded interview makes it easier for agencies to work together and also helps the child who does not have to constantly relive the experience as a result of multiple interviews.

The center also provides counseling for children and non-offending family members.

"It helps my parent and my child to reconnect," Piña said. "Abuse can be very isolating. You feel like you're alone. You feel like you're the only one."

Support for non-offending parents, who often feel deep guilt for what has happened, is especially important, Piña said.

"That's our support system," she said. "If we don't take care of our parents, our kids aren't going to be OK."

Maintaining the family unit is important to Children's Protective Services as well. In cases where children should be removed from their homes, a social worker usually will work with the parents to help them create a "plan of service" to help define changes that need to be made before the children will be returned.

Kevin Hart, associate judge for the South Plains Foster Care Court, said plans of service often require participation in parenting classes, psychological evaluations or treatment for substance abuse.

Hart, who oversees all cases involving children and foster care in Lubbock and eight other surrounding counties, said he looks at the level of the parents' level of fulfillment of the plan to help him decide the outcome of the child's case.

"The ultimate thing I'm looking for is whether the parents can provide the child with a safe and secure home," Hart said.

Volunteers with Court Appointed Special Advocates also help Hart make his final decision. When a case is brought before the court, Hart appoints a member of CASA as a guardian ad litem, a special temporary guardian for the child or children involved. This volunteer will work with the child, Children's Protective Services and the child's parents and foster parents.

"Based on that information they receive, their role is to recommend to me, as judge, what the outcome should be in the case," Hart said.

Children are returned to their homes in about 50 percent of all cases, Hart said.

"If parental rights are terminated, then kids will stay in foster care until an adoptive home can be found for them," Hart said.

But foster homes are scarce. Hart said children from the Lubbock area often must be sent to homes in surrounding communities, such as Midland or Amarillo. There is a need for more foster parents or relief parents (families who take children for a short period of time to give foster parents a break).

There's also a growing need for CASA volunteers, Bass said, and for people to get involved in public education about abuse.

"People can help raise awareness to legislators about those kinds of issues," she said.

And they can work to educate their community. In April, which is Child Abuse Prevention Month, volunteers with the Family Guidance and Outreach Center of Lubbock will cover the city with blue ribbons as reminders of the problem, said Alaina Bloodworth, program coordinator for the organization. The group also is planning a candlelight ceremony to commemorate victims of child abuse and to raise public awareness. It will be at 7 p.m. on April 4 at Westminster Presbyterian Church, 3321 33rd St.

More information about volunteer opportunities can be obtained by contacting CASA at (806) 763-2272, the Children's Advocacy Center at (806) 740-0251 or the Family Guidance and Outreach Center at (806) 747-5577.

The best way to get involved however, Bass said, is to simply watch out for the children of the community.

"Just be aware of what's around you, and report if you think something is wrong," she said. "(Child abuse) does happen, but there are things that we can do to help prevent it."

Copyright 2006 Daily Toreador

filed: social.issues

Guest Feature: Lubbock In The Dark: Homelessness

Ruth Bradley is a crack reporter and an official Friend of the Brink. She's got a five-part series on social issues in Lubbock, Texas running in the Texas Tech student paper, the Daily Toreador. We'll link to the articles, and we'll also run them here since you have to sign up to view them on the site.

Every day in Lubbock there are stories that go untold, pain that goes unheeded, cries that go unheard. This is the beginning of an answer to those cries. This is the first story in a daily five-part series about social problems in Lubbock, such as homelessness, prostitution and abuse. This is the side of Lubbock few people ever see, these are whispers barely noticed, lives lived out in the shadows. This is Lubbock in the Dark.



Erika Cook lives behind a Dumpster. Evicted from her apartment after the friend she lived with was hospitalized, she spends her days searching for a job, her nights huddled next to a pile of the few belongings she has left. She is alone. And a few weeks ago, she was attacked.

Cook said three men jumped her, coming up from behind.

"I was way outnumbered," she said.

Since the incident, which she did not elaborate on, Cook has worked hard to avoid people, trying to stay hidden.

"I'm scared and nervous," Cook said, "and wishing I could have found a job before I lost my place."

Mary George Beyer of Family Promise of Lubbock, a non-profit agency that provides temporary care for homeless families, said many of the homeless in Lubbock are in this same situation.

"They don't want to be seen," Beyer said. "They're afraid. Many of them are afraid of being robbed, either by another homeless person or by someone who just thinks it's fun."

Because of this Lubbock has an "invisible homeless," a group of people who live inconspicuously on the streets trying to avoid perpetrators and incidentally avoiding the community in general, Beyer said.

"Because they are not seen as much as they are in bigger cities, we don't think of there being a homeless problem," said Diane Hudson, family services director for the Salvation Army of Lubbock. "Ours are more of a hidden homeless."

Hidden from harm, but also from help. Because it is difficult to find these people, it is difficult to count them, a governmental requirement when requesting grants to assist in homeless care, Beyer said. Moreover, it means that many Lubbock citizens are unaware of the problem and its severity.

In January, 260 homeless were counted in local shelters. Bob Terrell, president of the South Plains Homeless Consortium, the organization that enacted the count, said the actual number of homeless in the area is probably much higher.

"We don't have any real idea," he said. "It's almost impossible to get a handle on it."

Terrell said many homeless simply don't want to be counted. Others live in places that would be unsafe for volunteers to survey.

Based on case notes, Hudson said the Salvation Army estimates that Lubbock has close to 300 chronic homeless; that is, men and women who stay homeless.

Though some of these have no better option because of personal mental health issues, Hudson said a portion of chronic homeless choose their lifestyle deliberately.

"There's lots of different reasons for a person choosing to be homeless," Hudson said.

Mark Stone, a homeless man, said he knows homeless people who don't want to get off the streets. But people often point to them as the norm, he said, while ignoring the needs of people who genuinely need and want help.

Many of these are people who have been forced out of their homes by overwhelming circumstances. An estimated 100 Lubbock citizens are expected to lose their homes within the next few months, said Connie Hindman, executive director for Family Promise of Lubbock. Some of these are people living paycheck to paycheck, one financial disaster away from the streets. Others are hurricane evacuees, whose Federal Emergency Management Agency money is about to run out.

"I think that homelessness is the social issue of this decade," said Hindman, citing natural disasters like Hurricane Rita and Hurricane Katrina. "Being homeless could happen to anybody."

It happened to Richard Moore. While living in Dallas, he commuted nearly 20 miles to work every day. When his car broke down, he had no choice but to quit his job. Unable to find work, he lived on the streets of Dallas for a time before making his way to Lubbock.

"Crime is rampant," said Moore, speaking of Dallas. "I haven't really met a bad apple around here."

While the streets of Lubbock may be safer, Moore said shelter and programs are much more limited.

"I think here there's a lot of indifference," he said.

Assistance is also hard to find, said J.D., a resident at the Salvation Army dorms who didn't want to give his full name.

"A lot of people just don't know where to go for help," he said.

The Lubbock Salvation Army provides shelter for three nights in a row, once a month per person. According to Beyer, this is the only shelter available for men without children. Women can apply to My Father's House or sometimes Women's Protective Services. Families are eligible to apply for Family Promise of Lubbock's program, which provides housing at local churches for a small number of families. Carpenter's Church provides a place to stay during the day and allows members of the church to sleep there on cold nights.

But there is always a hot meal.

"No one should be hungry in Lubbock," said Tom Clark, a volunteer at the South Plains Food Bank's Second Helpings Soup Kitchen, which provides meals for around 150 Lubbock citizens every Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday. Clark said the Salvation Army and Broadway Church of Christ cover the other days of the week.

The city of Lubbock also provides help with jobs. Homeless can visit the Texas Workforce Commission, use a call center at Carpenter's Church and are allowed voice mail with the Salvation Army for 90 days to enable potential employees to contact them.

Even these resources may not be enough, said Kelcie Kopf, a doctoral student in Texas Tech's College of Education who recently spent a night on the streets to learn about the homeless.

"If we want them to get jobs and keep jobs, we need to find them a place to stay off the streets," she said.

If they do find a job, homeless struggle to stay presentable, to get a good night's sleep and to find food, since the kitchens serve during business hours, Kopf said. Even if they can do all these things, they don't have a place to store their earnings, since most banks require that customers have a place of residence.

"They're put in danger because they're having to walk around the street with lots of money," Kopf said.

She said she believes Lubbock needs temporary shelters to help the homeless to get back on their feet.

Hindman said there is also a need for more affordable homes.

"Lubbock desperately needs low-cost housing," said Hindman. "We have a little, but the waiting list is so long."

Lubbock's North Overton district, one large site of low-cost housing was bought out in 2003 by McDougal Companies. Since then, the company has demolished the majority of the houses in the area to make way for construction of several mid-to-high cost housing developments.

"Short term, that was where the way affordable housing was," said Frye. "And it's all gone now."

Frye said Mayor Marc McDougal has been working on the problem, and the Mayor has met with him several times to discuss solutions.

Another problem in Lubbock is funds, particularly following the hurricanes this summer.

"I was very conflicted over the entire city of Lubbock's response to the Katrina evacuees," Beyer said. "The city of Lubbock did not reserve resources for our own."

Frye said financial contributions to Katrina and Rita evacuees also have affected Lubbock programs.

Contributions and volunteers are always needed, Hindman said.

"One thing [Lubbockites] can do is help support the organizations that are already in place," she said.

It's also important to treat the homeless with respect, Hindman said, and to give them a chance.

"So many people have the idea 'if those people would just get a job they wouldn't be homeless," she said. "Well, some of those people are working two jobs, and they are homeless."

Hindman tells the story of a man who came to Family Promise of Lubbock for help who told her he was scared to apply for the program.

"I asked 'what frightened you?'" she said. "He said 'I was so afraid of what you would think of me.'"

Mary Guetersloh, who works with the outreach ministry for St. Matthew's Church, said the way many homeless are treated makes them feel like they're "not worthy, they're trash, throw-away people." This often affects their ability to accept help.

"It's hard for them to trust in anything that comes their way," she said.

But for those who do, there is hope.

Hindman said when families leave Family Promise, they move into homes of their own. Most of them will keep these homes.

Moore enrolled in a program offered by the Lubbock Regional Mental Health Mental Retardation Center, which paid for his first month's rent. He is currently looking for a job.

J.D. is living in the dorms at Salvation Army while he works at one of their stores.

And Cook? A formerly homeless friend, who just got off the streets, offered her a place to stay.

For more information about volunteer opportunities to help the homeless in Lubbock, contact Hindman at (806) 744-5035 or Hudson at (806) 765-9434.

This is story one of "Lubbock in the Dark," a five-part series on social issues in Lubbock. Tomorrow's topic: Drug Abuse. Copyright 2006 Daily Toreador

filed: social.issues

Self-Worth and the Idiot

There's nothing worse than a confident idiot.

Ben, Official Friend of the Brink

This thought, along with corollaries like the Bible's "Even a fool is considered wise when he opens not his mouth", make a brilliant case that modern society (and especially our public education system) should focus less on convincing people of their self-worth and more on education so that some of that self-confidence might be justified.

filed: etcetera

RealFrogger in Austin

In a melding of robot-vacuum technology with classic video games, individuals with electronics skills, alcohol and time on their hands have created and deployed RealFrogger on Austin's 6th Street.

Follow the link for pictures of this momentous event, and descriptions like this:

The impact of the technology on Austinites has already been deep. During the nerve-wracking initial crossing, which took place below the balcony of the Herald suite at Austin's Driskill Hotel, passers-by were heard to exclaim, "Dude, it's Frogger!"

Will RealFrogger survive? Will the police arrest anyone? Will Austin's traffic be slowed any further than it already is? Is that even possible?


RealFrogger Technology Revealed at SXSW


filed: etcetera

Geekonomics, The Matrix, and Happiness

In The Matrix, the machine character Agent Smith tells us that humans cannot survive in a utopia--they need pain and struggle or they will not accept their surroundings as real. It seems that a similar idea holds true in (semi-)real life with the economies of online games. This Wired article gives examples of experiments and incidents that prove that unlimited resources in a world lead not to universal happiness but instead cause all of the players to leave for lack of a challenge. The lesson: if you had all the money you could want you would be...bored.


Wired.com: Geekonomics


filed: economics

Original Column: Valentine's Day is Coming

This is one in a series of columns I wrote for a local newsletter in the past few years. The column was called The Brink of Normal and it was mostly about public service, as you can see from the following article.

VALENTINE'S DAY IS COMING.

This announcement is important, gentlemen. If you are married you need to realize this now and begin preparing. If you are feeling sad this year because you don't have someone to share the day with, read on so you can laugh at the predicament of the guys who do. And ladies: do your guy a favor and subtly leave this column lying around somewhere where he is likely to find it and read it. In fact, forget subtle: Tape it to his windshield with a note that says something like "THIS IS UNIMAGINABLY IMPORTANT TO ME XOXOXOXO".

Let's look back at the origin of the holiday known as Saint Valentine's Day. Saint Valentine was someone who became famous for love, and this is his day. That's all I know, and that's all you need to know. Let's not confuse the issue.

I would like to address the feeling that Valentine's Day is actually a conspiracy cooked up by greeting card companies, florists and chocolate makers. Here's the deal, guys--it doesn't matter. I wonder about this myself, but sharing these thoughts can only get you in trouble. The best thing is to think of this day as an opportunity to share your love. In fact, as sappy as it sounds, you can actually get points by just saying that out loud. Unless it comes off as sarcastic, which will ruin everything.

Let's talk about expectations. What are you supposed to do on Valentine's Day? The traditional things are flowers, chocolates, cards and romantic dinners. Do all of those things. Yes, all of them. Why, you may ask? Let's imagine your wife talking with a friend on the day after Valentine's Day. She is so happy, because it was perfect. It was exactly what she hoped for, everything that she never dared dream. She has that enraptured smile, the look that says "The one for whom my heart beats has declared his undying love." Do you think you can achieve that with only a card that cost you $2.49, or even one of the really nice ones for almost 5 bucks? The answer is no, no you cannot!

Men, Valentine's Day (which always falls on February 14th, every year) is an investment. It is expensive. It requires planning. Like anything worth doing, it is worth doing right. You can do it. You must do it. You will do it! Success is the only option; the alternative is unthinkable.

As for specifics, I know what you're thinking about flowers: Why would I pay some stranger 50 hard-earned dollars to bring plant clippings to my wife? There is an actual reason deep in the feminine psyche related to conditioning by social influences and mass media, but I don't want to get into that. The point is that every time your wife sees them she thinks happy thoughts about you. This is nothing but good and it is the only point.

Keep in mind that ordering flowers on Valentine's is like shopping on Christmas Eve--nothing good is left. Plan ahead; plan very far ahead. Also, the flowers must be accompanied by an appropriate note. It should be flowery, sappy, and between five and twenty words. If you do it right you will be extremely uncomfortable reading it to the florist.

For the romantic dinner you'll want a nice restaurant. You're looking for candles, tablecloths, and extra pieces of silverware by each plate. You'll need to get a reservation now--they fill up long before, and they laugh at you if you call February 14th. It will be outrageously priced, but you can use this to your advantage. Every time you think about the bill or about how much it would actually cost to prepare each entree, compliment your wife. It should work out just about right.

As for the card and chocolates, yes, you still need them. The card is always good. Chocolates are usually good, but there are exceptions. If she is dieting, has some health issue, or hates chocolate then you should find out beforehand if she still wants them. The last words you want to hear coming out of your mouth are "I didn't get you chocolates because you said you were fat."

Before I finish I'd like to address the single people. Many now celebrate Single Awareness Day (SAD) on February 14th. If you feel this way and you are a guy, I would suggest a SAD party. Invite all of your likeminded friends and watch some ridiculous chick flick, mocking it the whole time. Then watch a couple of guy movies, eat all the food you can hold, make stupid jokes, and scratch your belly. You'll feel much better.

If you feel sad and you are a girl, you'll want to focus on the positive. Think about the things you can only enjoy while you are single. And notice the things you don't have to put up with. The very best way to do that? Go to the guys' SAD party.

filed: humor

What's My Headline?

Here's a cool web thing from the Official Brother-In-Law of the Brink. You've got a map, by continent, of newspapers across the world. Roll over the dots to see the front pages of today's paper there. Highly cool.


Newseum.org: Today's Front Pages


filed: cool.web.stuff

Answers to Creationist Nonsense?

Below is a piece in Scientific American by John Rennie, that magazine's Editor in Chief. A pretty involved and well thought-out crititique of creationism, it exposes flaws in some lines of creationist thought but also reveals weaknesses in the evolutionary doctrines it defends. For instance:

...Creationists, though, dismiss these fossil studies. They argue that Archaeopteryx is not a missing link between reptiles and birds--it is just an extinct bird with reptilian features. They want evolutionists to produce a weird, chimeric monster that cannot be classified as belonging to any known group. Even if a creationist does accept a fossil as transitional between two species, he or she may then insist on seeing other fossils intermediate between it and the first two. These frustrating requests can proceed ad infinitum and place an unreasonable burden on the always incomplete fossil record.

This is a valid point--how can an evolutionist prove evolutionism to a creationist? I'm not a scientist, but I can see that while two similar species would be obvious examples of evolution to an evolutionist, they would simply suggest a shared creator to a creationist. Both viewpoints are valid and possibly unimpeachable given the disparate paradigms involved. Now, examine Rennie's hypothetical suggestion of how that evolution could be disproved:

If we could document the spontaneous generation of just one complex life-form from inanimate matter, then at least a few creatures seen in the fossil record might have originated this way.... But no one has yet produced such evidence.

How could a creationist establish the spontaneous generation of a life-form to the satisfaction of an evolutionist? Assume for a moment that a creationist found a fossil of a life-form in a stratum indicating that it appeared suddenly, with no apparent ancestor. Would the evolutionist accept it as proof of non-evolutionary creation of life? Of course not. He would simply point to the "always incomplete fossil record" and expect future discoveries to bring to light the ancestors of the "spontaneously generated" fossil. Or, the evolutionist might believe that this "later" fossil shows that the stratum in question cannot be considered as old as was thought. Either way, the evolutionist would place the same "unreasonable burden" on the creationist's evidence that he complains of the creationist putting upon his own.


Overall this article asks some pretty interesting questions that honest thinkers on this subject must answer.


ScientificAmerican.com: 15 Answers to Creationist Nonsense


filed: science

My Friend, the World's Largest Sock Monkey

I like monkeys. This is a very large monkey, but he's not real, but that's OK. Plus he has his own MySpace account, which I think means that he is so smart and relationship-oriented that he doesn't bite or throw poo. These are the main reasons I'm not allowed to have a real monkey, so hopefully I'm getting him for Christmas.


The Incredible Mr. Buttons


filed: etcetera

Happy Holidays from the House of the Future

You haven't seen a house party until you see this one get down. I got an email claiming that this is in my hometown, but I haven't seen it. Apparently this house transmits a low-powered FM radio signal that you can receive on your car radio, and the lights/decorations dance/shimmer/move in time to the music. The song is Wizards in Winter by The Trans-Siberian Orchestra (who are neither from Siberia nor an orchestra--they're actually more like Mannheim Steamroller, but with more electric guitars).

So, to recap, we have a three-minute video of a decorated house set to weird holiday rock music. And yet it is strangely captivating.

note: this video is best at no greater than double size--set the zoom with the drop-down button on the bottom right.


Google Video: The Wizards of Winter


filed: etcetera

Embryo Survives Skydiving Accident

OK, the embryo was inside it's 21-year-old mother, who was diving solo for the first time. Sounds like mom did a good job of dealing with her chute not opening. The moral of this story is: always listen to those stupid safety rules.

Wired Furthermore: Born to be Wild


Update: FoxNews Video and Interview with the Skydiver
(scroll down to mid-page for the story and link)


filed: etcetera

Bono and World Government

I made an offhand (and offline) comment recently linking U2's lead singer Bono with proponents of a worldwide government. I haven't studied this too much or chatted with Bono about it, but actually just made an inference from some perusal over at Wikipedia. So here it is:

The Wikipedia article on Federal World Government notes that "the Universal Declaration of Human Rights is often referenced as the best expression of the most fundamental values motivating FWG supporters." The Wikipedia entry about Universal Declaration of Human Rights notes that "U2 projected the UDHR onto an enormous screen after performing their song 'Running to Stand Still' during their Vertigo 2005 world tour concerts. Their presentation also included individuals from around the world speaking selected articles of the UDHR."

So all that to say that I don't know Bono's take on the pros and cons of worldwide government, and his interest in the UDHR could be completely different from that of supporters of a Federal World Government, but I would tend to doubt it.

Sadly, I'm pretty sure that Bono won't be able to bring peace to this rock, as much as I'm sure he'd like to do so. And he can't walk on water, either.


filed: world.politics

The caricature of Bono walking on water is from this blog.

Original Column: 'Tis the Season

This is one in a series of columns I wrote for a local newsletter in the past few years. The column was called The Brink of Normal and it was practically an underground phenomenon that left a gaping void in the hearts of legions of fans at the end of its run. Or so I tell myself.


Every year as the retailers of America kick off the Christmas Buying Season I am caught off guard. I look around at the telltale signs—the unmistakable weather, the shopping frenzy, the expectant children’s faces—and I wonder aloud, “Is it August already?”

While I notice the buildup, I traditionally wait until later in the season to do my actual shopping. Usually much later. In fact, I am here to tell you that many merchants who claim to be “Always Open” will unceremoniously kick you out at midnight on Christmas morning, whether you are done with your shopping or not.

With these things in mind I have decided to bring you some helpful hints I have gleaned from my own quarter-century of holiday experience and a generous helping of the wisdom of others.

I know some of you craft-oriented people out there are still holding on to your dreams from last year about how you will hand-craft personalized knick-knacks of oak and ribbons for everyone on your Christmas card list, to be sent with a thoughtful letter conveying the activities of the family and the spirit of the season. Here’s the deal: if that was going to happen it should have been done back in the late summer when they first started selling Christmas decorations. The time has come to save your sanity, and the way to do that is not by affixing little felt baby Jesus cutouts to little felt manger cutouts until 3am every day for a week.

One important yuletide principle is that you should never give gifts in anger. Family lore has it that one year my grandmother gave Lincoln Logs to her sister’s kids because she was upset with their mother. I guess if you step barefoot on one in the middle of the night you might get the message, but the whole thing just doesn’t seem that malicious. I think it is because in a world where you can buy eighty-decibel bike sirens, plastic pellet guns and the Bucket’O’Slime, a few hundred Lincoln Logs in the dark would be a sweet relief.

As you go about buying gifts in love, keep in mind that an important part of the holiday experience is eating like a little piggy. I recommend that a large quantity of holiday goodies be on hand in case at any time a family member experiences a lessening of that overly stuffed feeling that the songs refer to as “good cheer”. On the other hand, I have now reached that point in life where my metabolism has slowed down past my appetite and I find that my body can store good cheer so that it lasts all year. So, while holiday snacks from cheese to chocolate may taste great, I must soberly change my recommendation to celery.

Now for some shopping tips for the new slimmer, trimmer, celery-powered you: It’s December; if you haven’t finished your shopping you should have. If you are nodding in agreement because you have already finished your shopping I don’t even want to hear about it. As for everybody else the best thing is to pace yourself, get lots of fluids and just shop till you drop.

For those of you who have not kept up with the spectacular advances of the toy industry, here is a rundown: Everything takes batteries. Of course the remote-controlled cars and trucks will probably drain their own weight in batteries on Christmas Day. Then there are the battery powered dolls and animals—without batteries they don’t talk, giggle, cry, squirm, spit up, roll over, fetch, jump, sing or order pizza. They just kind of sit there until you pick them up, which is obviously a completely ridiculous situation. To calculate how many batteries to buy, simply take the number of batteries you think you need and square it, lest you be confronted by a mob of children whose toys won’t play with them.

But of course shopping and eating and gifts are not really the point of Christmas. As our family has grown up I have come to appreciate the joy of giving to the ones I love. Even with all of the emphasis on receiving gifts, and as hard as it would have been to believe as a child, there really is more joy on the other side of the exchange.

The gifts should be a reminder of what we celebrate at Christmas, the greatest gift of all time—Jesus, as he came to earth so that we might have life more abundantly. So take a break this year during all of the hustle and bustle and busyness of the season, and consider what we commemorate—the coming of the Prince of Peace.


Merry Christmas.


filed: humor; column

Geologists Find the Cause of "The Great Dying"

The article below describes a time in ancient history (252 million years ago) when"life on the earth nearly ceased to exist--as much as 90 percent of marine life and 70 percent of terrestrial life died out." Sedimentary rocks from Italy (which were once on the bottom of a shallow sea), seem to indicate "that a great flood of ... terrestrial organic matter reached the sea and essentially swamped it, suffocating marine life."

The researchers believe that this, apparently the "earth's greatest mass extinction", was caused by ... a million-year-long intermittent Siberian volcano eruption. It seems the volcano, with its acid rain and pollutants and stuff, killed all the plants which were then washed into the sea. Humans and soil erosion are killing the planet again, by the way, so that may be "what is in store for us in the years ahead."

Seems to me that a worldwide flood would be a pretty good explanation for this Great Dying...


ScientificAmerican.com: Geologists Link the "Great Dying" to Volcanism


filed: science

The Bliss of Ignorance

Someone once said that the most important knowledge is knowledge of our own ignorance. Our schools are depriving millions of students of that kind of knowledge by promoting "self-esteem" and encouraging them to have opinions on things of which they are grossly ignorant, if not misinformed.

Thomas Sowell

I think that this quote encapsulates my discomfort with efforts like Rock the Vote. Voting is great, but I think it is important for voters to have a clue, and I fear that a voting bloc which rises as one on command from MTV may not represent a well-informed voice on the important issues of our day.


filed: us.politics; social.commentary; random.quotes

Original Column: How to Be Funny

This is one in a series of columns I wrote for a local newsletter in the past few years. The column was called The Brink of Normal and was full of humor and truly fun for all ages--and now it's back in convenient blog form!

As I searched desperately for a topic for my second column in this space, I thought about my rapid ascent to the heights of comedic expression. I suddenly realized that as a Humor Columnist I am now in a prime position to give hope and inspiration to the many young comedians out there. I’m all about public service, so this was an opportunity I couldn’t pass up.

You might think that those closest to you will appreciate your jokes. In fact I have found the opposite to be true. Often after a stunningly funny comment, my father will say, “Don’t give up your day job”—while obviously stifling his mirth. Sometimes I will reduce most of a group to tears of laughter and one of my siblings will shout, “Don’t laugh—it only encourages him!” My theory here is that a person can’t take too much of a good thing. If you are too funny too often for too long, people just get desensitized to it.

Now if you are just getting started being funny, you may be asking, “I’m just getting started. How can I be funny?” Well, I’m glad you asked.

Jokes

One popular way to make people laugh is to tell jokes. There are many jokes, so I won’t try to cover them all here, but good jokes have two things in common: cleverness and surprise. Let me demonstrate with an actual joke:

Q: What did the mommy bullet say to the daddy bullet?
A: “We’re having a BB!”

The cleverness is the BB/baby pun, and the surprise is the ending that most people don’t expect. Both are vital for the comedy of the joke. (Please note that plausibility is not a necessary element of good jokes like this one.) Here is the joke without the surprise:

Q: What did little BB’s mommy, Mrs. Bullet, say to her daddy, Mr. Bullet?
A: “We’re having a BB!”

The joke is still clever, but there is no punch to the punch line. It bores us. The same effect can be achieved by asking your audience, “Have you heard the one about the little BB?” before you tell the joke.

Now, here is the joke with the cleverness removed:

Q: What did the mommy bullet say to the daddy bullet?
A: “We’re having a giraffe!”

This is not funny. The end is surprising, but the joke is not clever. It frustrates the listener. You will hear questions such as “What does the giraffe have to do with anything?” Believe me, it has to make sense.

Puns

If telling jokes isn’t your bag, perhaps you should try puns. Puns are a personal favorite of mine, but they elicit more groans than any other form of comedy you can use. In fact, that’s the best result you can ask from puns. If you don’t believe me, just pop a simple pun into a conversation, like “That soccer player really gets a kick out of his sport” and then just watch what happens. Often nothing will happen. At this point you can simply repeat yourself until someone realizes that you have made a joke. When they roll their eyes or groan or throw something at you, they’ve gotten it.

After you master the pun, try making several in a row related the same subject. For instance, you could follow up the soccer pun with “I wonder if his parents toed him to play”, “They probably had to put their foot down”, and “He’s probably still waiting for the other shoe to drop.” Again, some people find this less funny than others, so be ready to hoof it.

Physical Comedy

Often seen as less intelligent than other forms of funniness, physical comedy has been employed by everyone from the Three Stooges to America’s Funniest Videos. However hilarious it may be on TV, it is often less so if you personally fall out of a boat or have someone whack your nose with a serving tray. In the same way, practical jokes (the home version of physical comedy) are usually funnier for the joker than the victim, and if you accidentally get your parents they can find ways of spreading the pain, if you know what I mean. I speak as someone who has soaked my mother with water and coated my father with baby powder. I guess I forgot to mention that when noting that my family doesn’t think I’m funny.

With these tools in your bag you know enough to be dangerous. In fact, as I write this I realize that having an aspiring humorist in the house could be as maddening as living with someone teaching themselves the violin. And I didn’t even talk about the more advanced comedy techniques such as Running A Joke Into The Ground.

I’m sorry to the families of the amateur comedians I’ve encouraged. I didn’t mean to create a monster. But just think; after only a few years they may actually have their own column, and then it will all be worth it.

Right, Mom?

filed: humor; column

The Fork System

Have you ever planned to go out for lunch to a place you've never been, only to wish that you knew what kind of a place it is? Maybe a friend told you it was "kind-of fast food" or "a little bit nice," but what does that mean? Just as measurements were invented when somebody realized that "itsy-bitsy" and "great big" weren't going to cut it, the world needs an objective rating system for eating establishments. And so, World, I give you The Fork System.

The theory here is that you can tell what kind of restaurant you're dealing with from their eating utensils. The Fork System does not attempt to rate restaurants, but rather to categorize them. While you may have a good experience at a nice, clean fast food place or a bad time at a dumpy, badly run one, they are both fast food eateries and will both have the same Fork designation.

Here is the system, with categories ordered by price from lowest to highest:


No Fork/Plastic Fork: The cheapest form of restaurant, Fast Food. If you don't need a fork, you don't get one; if your order requires one it is plastic and sometimes packaged in a plastic baggie with a knife, paper napkin and paper salt/pepper packets. Variation: The Spork, the plastic offspring of a spoon and fork, is probably my favorite utensil. If you get a spork, you're at a fast-food place.

Wrapped Fork: A step up in from No Fork, this is the Casual Dining category. Here you get a fork made of real metal, along with a spoon and a knife, wrapped tightly in a napkin. At this level the Waiter makes his first appearance. This is a fairly wide-ranging category, with prices from just above No Fork prices and all the way up into Single Fork levels. To further differentiate inside the Wrapped Fork category, take a look at the napkin that wraps your fork. A cheap paper napkin is low-end, heavy paper is nicer, and cloth napkins may tell you that your Wrapped Fork restaurant wants to be a Single Fork restaurant.

Single Fork: This takes us into the Fine Dining category. The fork is unwrapped, to the left of the plate, and the knife and spoon are on the right. The napkin is cloth and may be folded into some sort of origami. The food is no longer cooked by cooks, but is instead prepared by chefs. The prices are higher but are still on the menu. Gentlemen, this is generally the lowest level acceptable for marriage proposals, Valentine's Day dinners, and anniversaries--and call ahead, because you definitely can't just walk in and be seated on February 14th.

Multi-Fork: Like Single Fork, but more--definitely Fine Dining. At this level the more utensils you see, the fancier the restaurant. Salad Forks, dessert forks, several glasses. Maitre d's, tuxedos, studied unobtrusiveness by wait staff--the sky is the limit here. If you can't find a price by your entree you can't afford it.


So there you have it. I hope you're asking yourself "How can one guy come up with a system so brilliant, so revolutionary, so useful?" However, you are more likely asking yourself "Why would somebody spend their time making this stuff up?" All I can say is that the whole fork thing was a random thought, and I had to flesh it out and write it up to get it out of my system. This is why I have a blog.

And there's more where that came from.


filed: etcetera

This Just In: Old Food is Great

If you throw out perfectly good food just because it has passed it's expiration date or been left out overnight or sat in a Mormon's basement for thirty years, you must read this article.


Wired News: Oatmeal From '70s Still Tastes OK


filed: etcetera

Random Thoughts and Manufactured Music

You know how sometimes seemingly random thoughts just pop into your head? Usually these thoughts aren't all that helpful, like when I find myself singing twenty-year-old commercial jingles for no apparent reason. Occasionally I will come up with something more interesting, though. For instance, here's a very strange line of thought that has occurred to me:

A bat "sees" by emitting a noise and then listening for it to bounce back, and surely too much surrounding noise would hinder that capability. What if our own vision worked similarly? What if, instead of passively perceiving ambient light, our eyes could only process light they generated--like a flashlight in the dark except that we could each only use our own light, and others' light interfered with our own? What would be the effect on human social interaction? Maybe it would be rude to look steadily at anything in public since nobody else could see it while you look at it. What would rock concerts or church services look like since nobody could see if everybody was looking at the same people? It would probably put a premium on one-to-one and aural interaction.

Wow. I hadn't really tried to put that into words before. Like I said, very strange.

Anyway, I recently had a bunch of old Backstreet Boys songs stuck in my head. I find the best thing to do when this happens is to listen to the songs again. Now I have never actively listened to the Backstreet Boys (but I heard plenty of their work back in the day when they were everywhere), so I don't have the albums, but thanks to the magic of Rhapsody I listened to some of their hits. Here are some of my thoughts from that experience:

First of all, this is not good music. On this point I must agree with Ben, who is a music snob and was nearby during my Backstreet marathon. In fact, as he noted, 99 percent of my enjoyment of the whole experience was watching his reactions to it--anger, revulsion, snide commentary, depression, begging for mercy...

Some of it actually doesn't sound too dated--in fact, some of it sounds like Britney Spears. In fact, I think if you dropped Spears voice into "Larger than Life" you could almost pass it off as her latest. This brings me to a point about "manufactured" music-- most of the lyrics aren't written by the idols themselves, but by middle-aged English majors on caffeine and a deadline. Either that, or by a computer program (Love + heart + baby + forever = POP HIT) or by 10,000 monkeys with typewriters (this is Ben's theory). I think the music is handled by all of the same computer jockeys, which would explain why the Backstreet Boys from the nineties sounds similar to Britney Spears of today, or why all of Spears' hits sound the same.

Finally, Josie and the Pussycats has some very funny things to say about manufactured music. It features a boy band called Du Jour which is funny because du jour means "of the day". They're the boy band of the day! Get it? (Warning: It's rated PG for "sensuality and language", kids, so be advised.)


filed: etcetera; entertainment

Trash Talk and Dominoes

"It's funny to hear an 80-year-old man talk smack."

Friend of The Brink Ben S.

Ben was a passerby the other day in a small town at a particularly zesty game of dominoes. I'm not exactly sure what kind of put-downs you use to get in the other guy's head in that game, but whatever they are they must seem strange coming from somebody's Grandpa.


filed: random.quotes